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Keep in mind this is an international relationship and not the boy who lives 30 minutes away and I can meet him anytime.So how do I know if it’s worth it or if it’s all gonna be like a giant bomb exploding around me because what we have online or the phone just can’t be sustained “in real life.” I would like to know what to look for.

Then, they’ll develop a rapport over a few weeks and ask you to send money.

I have seen a lot of interesting questions about dating and the internet.

So here is mine: How do you know if this guy that talks to you on the phone for hours every day…and lives overseas…is for real?!?

If 99.9% of the men you’ve ever met are ones that you don’t want to marry, what are the odds that the guy who spends hours on the phone with you in another country IS the guy? That doesn’t mean he’s NOT the one, and it doesn’t mean you should suddenly stop returning his calls. Listen, nobody stresses establishing trust over the phone more than I do. Do you trust him enough to be secure when you haven’t heard from him in a bit? Throw them all together and, well, the odds are always very slim.

I just think it’s important to not get too excited about ANYBODY before you’ve, say, met in person. Except I’m usually talking about two phone conversations in a week before you meet. All of these questions can reveal a man’s emotional investment in you. Sometimes a man’s willingness to throw himself into a long-distance relationship means that he doesn’t have much of a life worth preserving at home. But the couples who make it despite those slim odds are bound to be the strongest. My opinion: if there is an option between dating someone in close proximity versus someone long distance, always, always go with the person in close proximity. Isn’t the reason we date to get to know someone better, perhaps to explore a long term relationship? How can you really get to know someone better and have companionship at a great distance.

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