“There is some evidence based on evolutionary psychology that a male is more likely to only want to raise children with his own genes to propagate his own genes.” Colleen Sweeney, of San Clemente, a single mother of a 3-year-old son, has a measured response to this idea.While the reactions to her child may vary from person to person, she feels that, more often than not, a potential partner may shy away from the presence of a child.Not long after they started dating, my father's new girlfriend had to move back to Thailand, without him.Despite the oceans between them, they've maintained their relationship.
The sound of his voice on the phone still makes my heart skip a beat.Case in point: Not only did I have to cope with the fact that his new girlfriend was half his age, but also that he was considering moving to Thailand with her. Now, he wanted to be committed to himself—spending some quality time on his own terms.Meanwhile, my own marriage had ended dramatically and very abruptly—and I wasn't exactly in the state of mind to be swept up in his romantic fantasy. He wanted to travel, eat dinner when and where he wanted, and wear his old underwear around the house.He'll fly overseas at a moment's notice, calling from the airport to say a quick goodbye. If she was using him, it wasn't for the little money he had. She made him laugh, she was smart, she challenged him. More than a decade earlier, he and my mother had gone through a messy divorce.He flutters from job to job, never really explaining his reasons for leaving, constantly finding himself in unlikely circumstances. They'd been madly in love for many years, but their marriage ended in screaming matches and arguments over money.